There are 3 state of mind
-Reasonable/logical Mind
-Wise Mind
-Emotion Mind


For a person diagnosed with BPD being in emotional mind can be hell. Many people diagnosed with BPD spend most of their time in emotional mind, they let their emotions run wild and rule them. Emotional and logical mindsets can make the situation worse there are outside factors too that can make being in emotional mind very difficult – over/under eating, poor sleep, wrong people, substances, music, physical environment (too hot or cold), not enough daylight, surroundings and stress.

Being in emotional mind can make a person diagnosed with BPD feel unsafe, impulsive, and unreasonable, have regrets; however emotional mind can also be good, can help someone to be creative, motivated. Ever written a song or a poem, been artistic? During those times you may have been in emotional mind especially if you noticed your emotions more than usual.

Taking hold of your mind “WHAT” skills

-Just noticing the experiences without getting caught up in the experience
-Have a ‘Teflon’ mind nothing sticking, thoughts come in and go straight out again
-Control your attention but not what you see, pus nothing away but don’t cling to anything either!
-Be alert to every though, feeling and action that comes into your mind
-Watch your thoughts coming and going as if you looking into your mind via a window
-Notice your senses, what sensations you feel through your eyes, ears, nose, skin and tongue

-Put words on the experience, so when a feeling or thought arises you do something, acknowledge it. “Sadness has just engulfed me”, “my stomach feels tight” a thought such as I can’t do this has just come into my head (that thought is just a label)
-Put experiences into words, put a name on your feelings, a though just a thought, a feeling is just a feeling, don’t get caught in content.
-Once you have had a thought notice it as a thought, once you judge it you have a choice what to do in response

-Become one with your experience – enter the experience let yourself become involved in the moment, letting go of ruminating – completely forgetting yourself
-Actively practice you’re skills as you learn them until they are a part of you where you use them without being aware.

-Changing harmful situations
-Changing your harmful reactions to situations
-Accepting yourself and the situation as they are.

Taking hold of your mind “HOW” skills

-Take a non judgemental stance when observing, describing and participating. Focus on the “what” not the good or bad
-Unglue your opinion from the facts, from the who what when and where
-Accept each moment for what it is
-Acknowledge the helpful and wholesome but don’t judge it the same with the unhelpful and harmful.
-When you find yourself judging, don’t judge your judgments

-Focus on one thing at a time with awareness with the whole person on the task
-let go of the distractions and go back to what you are doing over and over
-Concentrate your mind – do one thing at a time

-Focus on what works. Do what is needed to be done in the situation, knowing the situation rather than what it should be
-Play by the rules don’t cut your nose off to spite your face
-Act as skilfully as you can meet the needs of that situation, not one you wish you were in or one that is more comfortable
-Keep an eye on your objectives in the situation and do what is needed to achieve them
-Let go of vengeance, unhelpful anger and righteousness that hurts you and doesn’t work.


Linehan, M. Skills training manual for treating borderline personality disorder. 1st. New York, NY: The Guilford Press, 1994. Print.

McKay, M., J. C. Wood, and J. Brantley. The dialectical behavior therapy skills workbook, practical dbt exercises for learning mindfulness, interpersonal effectiveness, emotion regulation &. Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Pubns Inc, 2007. Print.

One Response to “Mindfulness”

  • One of my colleagues is very emotional every time she did something wrong or did not achieve certain things. Sometimes it’s hard to be with this kind of person because they won’t listen with your advices and keep blaming their selves. Full of regression and feeling they are alone. Thanks for sharing this article, it adds more information or guidelines dealing with this kind of behavior.

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